Facebook Family

Okay people, this needs addressing. It's driving me crazy.

I get that it's really hard to not give in to the pressure you're under to add your family members as "friends" on Facebook, and the majority of the time that is just fine, but there needs to be one caveat. NO OLDER GENERATION FAMILY MEMBERS!!!! Seriously guys, why do you do it?! Granted I am eternally grateful that my mother's concept of the interwebz leaves her completely confused as to how email works, what on earth a "blog" is and my personal favourite of "why is that thing with all the pictures called Facebook" - but you too can avoid this dangerous pitfall with just a few simple clicks.

1. Ignore the friend request
2. Add family member to block list so as not to hurt their feelings
3. Smile and continue to post inane bollocks...

The amount of times that a perfectly good status moment has been ruined by a family member is astounding! And yes, the person I'm thinking of can probably work out who he is, but let's have a paraphrased example just to prove my point.

Friend X - I'm in the cellar of the devil
Friend X's aunt - Are you okay dear, do you need to talk? I'm worried about you.
Friend X - I'm drinking Castillo de Diablo Merlot, it translates to Cellar of the Devil....
Friend X's aunt - Oh thank goodness!

Now, most of your friends will know that you are writing a random status you find funny and that you think will make them think and/or laugh. Older family members do not have this bullshit filter people!!! Anything in the style of ironic will be taken as god given proof of your apparent spiral into the depths of depression, and will be tackled by hugely embarassing concerned status comments... And really, exactly what do they think they will achieve by commenting on your status?! If you are in the bowels of depressive behaviour I doubt a quick chirpy thought on your Facebook page will be the catalyst that wrenches you back from the edge and makes you realise the world is happy and sparkly once more... That's why we have alcohol! And lapdancing clubs...!

Also, family members have the inate ability to ruin the flow of a good comedy comment chain. One post about having tea and scones, several comments parodying the Britishness of it, and a final nail in the coffin from a family member praising the selection of scones over cigarettes... *facepalm*

Be close with your family, that's awesome, but for all our sakes, keep it off Facebook! OR create a second fake profile and keep them all in there, it's safer....!!!